Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay made the right choice
Yes, it was the most emotionally intense and shocking Bachelorette Finale ever!
First, Rachel Lindsay is a smart, sassy and self-assured woman, setting aside our love conquers all fantasies and Peter’s realistic rationale, when Rachel chose Bryan Abasolo – love got it right.
If you like dating a mysterious hard-to-figure out man; if you love the thrill of worrying and wondering where you stand; if you enjoy giving more than you get, and pursuing over being pursued, then yes, Peter is the right guy.
Peter might have been interested, but not enough to be all in. Fair enough. Maybe he was afraid or he was motivated to secure title as the next ‘Bachelor’.
Why Peter didn’t feel ready doesn’t really matter. His choice to string Rachel along, and mislead with push-pull, back and forth, wishy-washy B.S. is a jerk move and there’s no excuse for it.
It’s time we stop making excuses for indecision and a lack of self-awareness. Asking a woman to eliminate all other options, while withholding commitment, is a self-centered choice. Nice Gals, say NO to any man asking for your whole heart and exclusivity, yet undecided.
In perfect No More Nice Gal confidence, Rachel Lindsay kept the standard high from beginning to end, saying,
“I want a man who is secure and confident, and knows what he wants and where his life is going. I don’t want a boyfriend, I want a husband.”
This is a woman on a mission to fulfill her dream of love, marriage, and babies with a man who is her passionate match and best friend. She found it in Bryan.
In contrast, a man who doesn’t know what he wants or what he has to offer in a relationship is dangerous because he’s figuring out his life and feeling on your time and heart. There’s nothing fun or sexy about dating (and trying to fix) an emotionally unavailable man. It is a big risk to play wait and see, and hope something changes.
Meanwhile, the baby clock is ticking and noticing your unmet needs transforms any romantic feelings into frustration, sadness, and bitterness.
No More Nice Gal is about NOT falling for a man’s potential and NOT jumping through hoops to convince him you’re worth pursuing and keeping. The romantic ideal in movies portrays love as overcoming great obstacles and even doubt, but beyond this illusion, real love is steadfast, honest, and fulfilling.
One thing maturity, wisdom, and heartbreak teaches is that the merry-go-round, wishy-washy drama isn’t worth anyone’s feelings or time. Message to the Peter’s of the world; figure out what you want on your own time.
To the happy couple… I wish you an abundance of joy and love.
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